The world is trying to hijack, alter and change words at such a rapid pace it can be difficult to keep up. Divorce, is a word quickly associated with marriage but historically has a more basic understanding and definition. Divorce is an action, a verb. Divorce means to separate and dissociate one thing from another. Americans tend to think of divorce as a noun but however you use and hear the word, it identifies a lack of commitment and infidelity, unbelief and unfaithfulness.
In America, the divorce rate for first marriages is 40-50%. The divorce rate in a second marriage grows to 60-70%. More interesting is the fact 70% of all divorces are initiated by the woman. In the case of divorce between college educated wives and husbands, 90% are initiated by the woman. This data uses the biological definition of a man and a woman and may cause consternation among some people. For purposes of this discussion, I will assume a Christian perspective that acknowledges a Biblical definition and historical understanding of men and women taken from the Bible and biological sex.
God knows that a man needs a woman to help him and make his life more full and complete. God also knows a woman needs a man in the exact same way. This need is not just physical, emotional or financial. The need we have for each other is spiritual. We were made from the same flesh and joined together at Creation. When man and woman marry, GOD unites us as one flesh, one spirit and one mind. Marriage between a man and a woman literally joins us together at the hip, soul and spirit. It also unites us in the same manner with God.
In the book of Genesis, the Bible tells the story where Eve submitted to the temptation of the evil one and the first divorce/separation dissociation was recorded. The rest is history but as with most divorces one person rarely gets all the blame. Eve’s actions were not alone. Adam sat by and passively kept quiet therefore being complicit in divorcing mankind from our Creator. In 2025 everything old is new again.
The Bible tells the story about the first divorce and how it was reconciled. There IS one way to reconcile when men and women break their commitment and covenant with each other and with God; Jesus. This may sound like lame Christianese to couples that are angry and hurt and just want to move on, but it is very real. Christ’s life, death and resurrection proved that God is willing to forgive and heal our first divorce from Him. He sacrificed His only Son to reconcile the divorce Adam and Eve initiated. If a couple believes there is too much water under the bridge for reconciliation in their marriage, it is simply a reflection on their faith in a God that is too small. Said more bluntly, they do not serve the God of the Old Testament and His son, Jesus. They are serving their own selfish desires.
Christians profess to believe in God but I wonder if they’ve lost sight and knowledge of who and what they serve. Our churches have focused on Christ’s love and forgiveness at the expense of His power and miracles. Culture has made Jesus to be a guy walking around smiling with long flowing hair. Therefore, His followers have become complacent and content with a mere ticket to eternity. Have we forgotten the miracles of Jesus and his ability to reconcile the very first divorce? And His calling for us to do the same.
Jesus not only walked on water, healed the blind and raised the dead, His apostles and disciples did the same. Peter’s shadow even healed the sick! In talking about the scope of what would happen in the future, Christ said ‘whoever believes in me will do the works I have been doing and they will do even greater things than these.’ I don’t care how impossible your spouse is, God is MORE than capable. I guess the question is, ‘Will you be part of what God wants or do you prefer your own agenda?’
The data for Americans show less people identify as Christian than ever. Less people attend church than ever. Do Christians talk about seeing miracles in their marriage or everyday lives and relationships? God hasn’t changed but many of His followers have forgotten how big, powerful and capable He is. If you think your marriage is over, you don’t know Jesus.
You might ask, ‘Have we lost the knowledge of who and what Jesus is??’ As evidenced by the rate of divorce in America the answer is a resounding YES. If Christians doubt restoration in their marriage or from a divorce, they are serving a dumbed down and diluted Christ. Although this has become the trend and our faith has been weakened, our God hasn’t changed.
The Bible reminds us the current trend will come to an end and for many it will be too late. Another doctrine we need to remember is the fact there is a last call. We all know what last call means and we all know once that time comes it IS too late. Before your last call, get right with God. When Christ returns He isn’t coming to love everyone. When Jesus returns He’s coming ‘to judge everyone, and to convict all of them of all the ungodly acts they have committed in their ungodliness, and of all the defiant words ungodly sinners have spoken against him.’
‘It’s too late for my marriage.’ ‘God can’t change my spouse or me.’ ‘I hate that person. God can’t change my feelings or our past.’ These are defiant words and ungodly acts. Consider what you say and do with gravity.